Anger

If you want to learn about anger, hang out in an urgent care setting. We get more of our fair share of angry clients on a weekly basis. What causes anger? Why is it wired in to every person? Is there positives in anger?

Anger is a signaling device for sure. If anger presents it's ugly head, something underneath needs to be addressed - NOW!

When on overwhelm, the mind shuts down and can not process information the same way. Our first defense is putting up a shield - anger is one of the best. This keeps people away and gets our needs met in the most primitive way.

Usually anger goes hand in hand with regressive behaviors. A regressive behavior is similiar to a roller coaster ride back to an earlier version of ourselves. Suddenly the thinking rational part is gone and what is left is a suffering younger aspect of us that is trying to survive to the best of it's ability.

We had a person come in to the urgent care that was extremely angry and looking for a fight. As a therapist I have to deal with these people. How do I survive their onslaughts? Remain calm, ask them what they need, fulfill these needs to the best of my ability as quickly as possible, and move them to the front of the line for the psychiatrist to see. Often these irate people are given medications to calm them down, with their prior authorization of course. Then the waiting game begins - when is the medication going to kick in?

Underneath our anger is hurt feelings from our past. If we aren't in a stable place to work through our past "undoings" eventually they will undo us, and others if they are in the way. Well, this client was making sure she was safe by terrorizing the patiently waiting clients.

When there is a threatening situation, the priority is to protect who? The staff? The clients in the waiting room? Well actually the number one priority is protecting the patient who is unstable. Of course we also care for the other patients, often removing them from the room or into vacant offices if gets violent.

Until the client calms down and returns to their right mind, then is the time to explore what was going on under the surface. What triggered this? Did something remind them of difficulties from their past? Is this a repeatitive cycle that needs working on in therapy? To the latter question the answer is a resounding YES!

When love is applied to our hurt healing takes place. For those who are chronically angry they need to risk feeling their hurt and being tender with it. It takes an adult to face our underlying hurt. A person needs to have the mental make up to do so. If not, then medication management is the only option and strict adherence to the medication regime is essential.