Choosing My Battles

Eight years at a Mental Urgent Care. Eight years of battling with clients, staff, and administration. To this point I have done pretty darn well. Of the over 15,000 people and more than triple the amount of sessions, this place remarkably has run pretty smoothly. It is interesting that on the way to work I listened to the Phil Collins Song "You and Me in Paradise" about the trouble there is in paradise. Though the urgent care is far from paradise for sure.

We have had some troubling incidents on our unit recently. Because I have fostered a great relationship with the regional manager of our corporation I have hesitated to make a mention of anything to him - which to me is being extremely cool. Hey, every job has certain incidents that take place and people have an innate way of wanting to cover things up to keep the status quo. I get it. I even understand when a person blatently fabricates information to protect their or the company's good name. Yes I get that and understand the human condition. But lately the rope that holds me back from being a snitch is fraying. So what do I do?

I am not perfect, no far from it, but I do know right from wrong and will admit when I fall short of my own and professional standards. So here I am trying to choose my battles. Because perhaps a few incidents didn't have the t's crossed properly or the i's dotted the way I and other staff members would like them, does it mean to go to the higher up with guns ablazing? What would that prove? A small majority being "right"? Then what? Okay what if my side won? Would that mean there would have to be a loser? If that is the reality of the situation then everybody loses.

So here I type with rope fraying, wondering if I should yank or release. Yanking would cause ill feelings, releasing would me understanding the human condition - the desire to struggle in the right and wrongness of a situation. Releasing to the path of lease resistance I guess. Though often times the releasing feels abusive to one's morals. Who wants to allow people to have their way when your opinion differs 180 degrees? Who wants to let go and let God so to speak when the righteous part rebelling from God just has to win. The acronym for EGO is Edging God Out for those who never knew. I am well aware that the Ego me is week and wants power in order to be safe. Releasing to the status quo is not very empowering to the Ego, but to the overall good screams strength!

So I choose to release my rope for now, though do know that it is dangling somewhere within reach for the proper battle - if there ever really is one.

Peace.